Wednesday, September 24, 2014

Rage Tears

You all know I teach high school math in a public school here in Maine. I've occasionally voiced my frustrations, both with what public school is and has become, and the idiosyncrasies of my particular school.

I don't have the emotional energy to get into it all here, but I left work today in rage tears.

Below is my Facebook post about it.  Comment if you are curious, and I'll write more. This is far, far too important to ignore, but most people are so far removed from what actually happens in schools that all they know is what they see on TV.  That is to say, folks see angry unions against angry politicians. There's no honest dialogue because there's too much name-calling and too many agendas and egos in the way.  All most people know about schools right now is spin, and that there's this thing called Common Core.  People have mixed opinions, if any at all.

I am not political. I can't say anything about my ego -- that's for you to judge.  But I'm in the schools, and my voice is SILENCED because I need a job.

Well, screw it. I need a job, but I also need to do what's right for kids.

Here's my Facebook post...

Feeling incredibly, ridiculously discouraged after a meeting about the Smarter Balanced assessment. It's not our school, it's not our kids, it's the exam. The implementation idiosyncrasies on top of all of it will make me lose my mind. I have a moral problem with setting our kids up to fail, and that is what this test does. I can not defend that *to anyone.* I can not, in good conscience, put my head on my pillow at night when I am one of many cogs allowing this to happen. When good people do nothing, evil prevails. That is what is happening, people. In the meantime, my colleagues think I am crazy. This isn't just poor practice. This is BAD FOR KIDS, and those of us to try to stand up to stop it risk losing our jobs.

Then, someone commented, and here are my two replies:

I wanted to quit. I was crying rage tears. Mick says it is time to be LOUD and attach my name to it.

That doesn't even get to how much instructional time we lose to practice for these and how my AP class keeps getting time taken away, including time to take these tests PRIOR to our AP exam. When I already only see them every other day. RAGE TEARS.

--Jen

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